This Is Me

To put it lightly, I never fit into a group or a crowd. I had friends that came and went, but never had a group to call my own. I went to school and did well in school because of high expectations put in place by my family and nothing else. School is where I felt safe, but never quite fit in. I’m not one of the weird kids, or at least I never felt like I was; I simply just didn’t stick with all of the values and decisions others around me were making at the time. I played soccer and joined clubs, but nothing seemed to quite categorize me into a correct group. Of course, I hung out with friends that were friends with the guy I was dating or told stories to just about any girl that stuck around long enough to listen, but none of this seemed to satisfy my craving for a real group of friends. College came up quick, and now I am attending a school that is in the middle of no where (or at least it seems like it) and is not where I have pictured myself ending up. I am currently hanging out with a small group of people that are nice, just not the type of people I thought I would have in my life my freshman year of college. They are my rocks though, and I would lean on them for absolutely anything I need support with. A little more about me though…I love writing, but not reading. I love playing soccer, but not running. I love long walks on the beach, but not the part where the sand is soft. I seem to still hate important elements of things I love. It is weird being me, but every day I’m learning to love me a little more; even the weird parts. So while I’m stuck in the library with no motivation to start my next big paper, I will be updating whoever might be reading this on what life has been throwing at me, and how I am learning to deal with it one day at a time.